


After the War

by lannisterslioness



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Maybe - Freeform, Mild Smut, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-War, i don't know yet, tagging just in case
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2017-01-01
Packaged: 2018-08-19 06:52:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8194523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lannisterslioness/pseuds/lannisterslioness
Summary: It's three years after the Resistance has won the war against the First Order, and trying to settle into a normal life is harder for some than others after this victory. Poe tried his best to be like his friends, to keep it together and become a leader when the rebuilt New Republic needed leaders desperately, but the weight of it all became too much and instead the former hot-shot Commander settled on his home planet of Yavin 4 to get some peace. When a familiar face, Rey, comes back into his life however, things start to slowly change as she unknowingly helps him out of his depression and the spark they once had starts to surface again.





	1. New Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: After all this time, I still haven't gotten better at descriptions. Either way, this is something my brain came up with earlier today/last night while on a bunch of cold medicine to get rid of this terrible cold I've had. I wanted to try writing something a bit more realistic for this lovely pair I still love to pieces, and I wanted to see if I could actually pace myself with writing something like this instead of rushing into everything like always. I hope you guys like this different take I've decided to run with, reviews are always appreciated <3

Poe still woke up with nightmares, no matter how much time passed, no matter how many other good things happened to block it out, the nightmares always came and prevented him from ever getting a good night of sleep. Then again, there were no such things as good nights of sleep ever since his encounter with Kylo Ren. It had almost been three years now, the war was long over, there was nobody left to fight and there was finally peace in the galaxy, however finding peace in his dreams was still something that had eluded Poe. He sat up in bed, the sun still not rising yet, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep without taking that drug doctors had given to him time and time again to help him sleep and yet he refused to take; he certainly wasn’t going to start tonight. Instead he threw his legs over the side of the bed, the sudden movement waking his trusted companion - BB-8 - up from his own charging slumber, and rolling over to Poe’s side with a cheerful beep.

 

     _[Good morning Friend-Poe!]_ The little droid chirped, no matter the time of day that Poe woke up, BB-8 was always up and ready to go, battery fully charged or not.

 

    “Morning Beebee-Ate.” Poe mumbled, though still managing a smile in his sleepy haze. “Busy day, things to do and people to see.” Poe lied, his days hadn’t been busy in awhile, not since he left Coruscant a year ago to _‘take some time’_ and try and get his thoughts together.

 

     _[Of course! When do we start?]_ BB-8 questioned.

 

    “After some coffee, and some breakfast maybe.” Poe yawned, finally getting himself up and out of bed and shuffling over to the bathroom.

 

     _[I’ll go start the machines!]_ BB-8 replied before rolling out of the room, Poe trying to stifle his laugh as he heard BB-8 maneuver his way down the stairs, even after all this time, he still wasn’t very graceful when it came to tackling stairs.  

  


* * *

 

  


    Yavin 4 was a quiet and peaceful place, it always had been for as long as Poe could remember. It was why he came back to him homeworld, after the war ended, after the business of Coruscant became too much, home seemed like the perfect and natural place to go. The house he bought wasn’t too far away from his father, still living in Poe’s childhood home, and it wasn’t too far from town if he ever needed anything or just needed to get out of the house. His friends would come by often, the ones who made it at least; Snap always came to just have a drink at the house and catch up with each other, while Jess would come and drag Poe out to some cantina in some corner of the galaxy and try to get him incredibly drunk. Finn still lived on Coruscant, striving to keep the peace that they had fought for so valiantly in the war, he would come by when he could; Leia would often visit as well when she just wanted away from the chaos and needed to talk to someone who wasn’t part of the government mess. Rey, well, he didn’t know where Rey was now, sadly. When the war ended, she finished training with Luke Skywalker on Ahch-To, she briefly spent some time on Coruscant - though mostly to spend some time with her mother, Leia, after everything that had happened during the war, and after that she just vanished, leaving to go explore some part of the galaxy; he and Rey had their moments however.

 

    During the war, whenever they were in one place for a prolonged period of time, there was this connection that Poe could always sense, he was as drawn to her as she was to him. They’d talk, flirt, sort of careless things like that, and then there was the kissing, usually in times of extreme panic or thinking they were about to die, but then when they were safe they’d go right back to normal, never pursuing whatever that spark really was between them. It was times like these when he was working on his X-Wing, giving his hands something to do, that he thought about her, Rey with that look of pure excitement and wonder whenever she got her hands on a ship and started going to work on them, she became particularly fond of the Falcon for obvious reasons, but she had a love of X-Wings that ran just as deep as Poe’s. Back then, she would often join Poe in fixing up his ship, offering up new ways of fixing it up and making it faster, along with him teaching her some things about the ships that she might have overlooked.

 

    “You keep working on that ship, but I haven’t seen you fly her in over a week.” A familiar voice called out, belonging to no one other than Poe’s father - Kes Dameron - and making his usual daily morning visit, still an early riser himself after all these years.

 

    “Fuel line got corroded, I had to wait until I got the part to fix her up and take her out again.” Poe explained, it was true, he flew his X-Wing every chance he could still just to get a bit of freedom though he had all the freedom in the world now, it was just a different type of freedom he got up in the ship, and as often as Poe flew it, things always broke here and there.

 

    “You’re mom would fly her ships to death too.” Kes laughed as Poe got out from underneath the ship, wiping the oil off of his hands though he couldn’t do much about the fuel smell that was now soaked into his skin. “Are you gonna fly out to Coruscant later this week? They’re having that big celebration, kriff, even I got invited to it.” Kes smirked.

 

    “I might, not sure yet.” Poe shrugged. He’d gotten the invitation too, some giant party that the New Republic was going to have to celebrate their victory and peace that had been going on for three years, it wasn’t something he was really interested in, despite those that he knew that would probably be there.

 

    “You should.” Kes quietly mentioned. He was worried about him, that much Poe could tell, he tried his best to hide the things the war had scarred him with from his father since he had his own dark burdens to bear, but his father just knew, Poe figured it must have been a parent's intuition.

 

    “I’ll figure it out.” Poe replied, hoping that would drop the topic for now, and from what he could tell, it did. “You want something to eat?” Poe asked.

 

    “Sure, as long as you let me cook it, you may have got the flying from your mother but you did not get the gift of cooking from either of us.” Kes laughed.

  


* * *

 

  


    Most of the day had gone by pretty quickly, Poe spent the rest of it alone with BB-8 in the house, drawing whatever came to mind. It was mostly images burned into his mind from the war, things he couldn’t forget no matter what he did. They weren’t always dark and painful memories, some of them were good - really good - like the smiles on his friends faces when they would win a battle, or when they won the war. He was in the middle of a darker drawing however, an image that haunted him still to this day despite his fate, the masked face of Kylo Ren, pulling thoughts from his head and ripping them away as if it was nothing to him, and in fact it had been, but to Poe it was everything. The detailed drawing and memory were thankfully interrupted by a loud banging on the front door that jolted Poe to his feet and rushing to the door.

 

    BB-8 was behind him, rolling as fast as he could down the stairs to keep up and right at Poe’s side as he tore the door open, and was surprised with the sight of a Wookie. Not just any Wookie however, Chewbacca, with Rey leaning against him and trying to cling to her consciousness. Chewie growled and groaned and tried to communicate, but Poe never quite learned Wookie as well as he should have and BB-8 had to translate.

 

     _[Friend-Rey is hurt badly from a fight on Tatooine, Chewbacca says she wanted to come here before the fight but now she needs help!]_ BB-8 translated.

 

    “Buddy, go get my dad over here quick.” Poe ordered, Kes was no medic, but he knew more than Poe certainly did. “Chewie, bring Rey over here to the sofa, let me see what’s wrong.”

 

    Chewie nodded and scooped Rey up easily, carrying her over to the sofa and gently lying her down, Rey still keeping her eyes open though she winced in pain when lying down. Poe knelt by her side and instantly saw some of the blood from the back of her head, aside from the busted lip and bruises and cuts everywhere, though some seemed to be healing telling him they were older than today’s injury.

 

    “Hey Poe.” Rey’s voice was weak, but she forced out a grin at the sight of him.

 

    “Hey.” Poe smiled right back at her, knowing that talking would keep her awake. “You sure do know how to make one hell of an entrance, I haven’t seen you almost two years and you come barging in here all beat up.”

 

    “They cheated, and they caught me off guard for once.” Rey explained, still smiling and reaching up to touch Poe’s face, probably trying to see if he was real or some crazy hallucination. “Besides, I like making an entrance now.”

 

    “I can see that, you might be taking after Han just a bit too much, can’t say he wouldn’t be proud though.” Poe offered up, ever since Rey had learned of her parentage, she’d been trying her best to learn about the father she lost too soon, becoming more than a bit reckless in the process, but Poe had been reckless once too, and Rey was still so young, she had time left to be reckless.  

 

    “I think he would have especially appreciated how I knocked out the one who gave me this gash in the back of my head.” Rey smirked.

  
    Kes came rushing in with BB-8, a medical kit filled with everything from bandages to Bacta in his hands, and Poe just kept Rey talking while he patched Rey up, her gripping onto his hand the whole time. And for the first time in a while, Poe felt that warm and gentle spark again that he only felt with Rey around.


	2. Time Gone By

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: So this chapter took me a while, not only because of my work/school schedule, but because I wrote it out once and went back to redo it all because I felt it needed to have things added to it! So here is the new chapter! Hope you guys enjoy it and comments are always appreciated!

    Rey wasn’t sure when she finally passed out, all she remembered was hearing Kes Dameron tell her she could rest now if she wanted, and Poe pulling a blanket over her and giving her a light kiss on the forehead. Now she was still on Poe’s incredibly comfortable sofa, the lack of light from the windows told her it was nighttime now, and she heard only faint mumbling coming from the kitchen that must have belonged to Poe. She shifted a bit, trying to get up, and as soon as she did so she groaned in pain; the Bacta did wonders, but there was only so much it could do in a short period of time, it wouldn’t be until morning sometime that she wouldn’t have anymore pain. The groan instantly alerted Poe, his talking ceasing as he head straight towards her, immediately kneeling at her side as soon as he entered the room. 

 

    “Hey, look who’s finally awake.” Poe smirked. “Feel any better?” 

 

    “Better than before.” Rey replied and grinned from ear to ear when that got a laugh out of Poe. “How long was I out for?” 

 

    “About five hours or so.” Poe said. “Chewie told me that you hadn’t been able to get much sleep over the past few days so I was trying to let you rest.” 

 

    “Speaking of the Wookie, where is he?” Rey questioned, noticing the lack of groans and roars that could only belong to Chewie. 

 

    “He went to Coruscant to tell Leia that you were alright.” Poe sighed. “The Falcon is still here, he took one of my dad’s ship, I think he was hoping you’d stay here for a bit, it’s kinda hard to fly the Falcon without a co-pilot, or so I’m told.” He smirked. 

 

    “It is.” Rey replied with a grin herself now. Why was she grinning? If Chewie had left her anywhere else in the galaxy, she’d be furious, but here with an old friend like the ever charming Poe Dameron...it wasn’t that bad. “Well, if you don’t mind the company, something tells me it’ll be a day or two before Chewie comes back...mind if I stay here until then?” Rey asked hesitantly. 

 

    “You’re more than welcome to stay here, you can stay as long as you want.” Poe offerened. “I’ve got an extra bedroom down the hall from mine, that’s all yours for as long as you stay here.” 

 

    “A bed sounds fantastic. I love the Falcon, but those cots are awful after a while.” Rey said, just the mere thought of the rock hard beds on the Falcon made her muscles stiffen up. 

 

    Poe just smiled, and Rey couldn’t help but smile back; he could always make anyone feel happy as long as he was around, he’d always managed to get a smile out of her for as long as she had known him. Even when they were in the thick of their darkest times, even after Rey had to face her deepest fears, he got her to smile, weather it was just being there for her, or making some cheesy wisecrack, he made her feel just a bit happier, even if it only lasted for a moment, it meant everything to her. 

 

    “Well, as long as you’re here, no more sleeping on the Falcon.” Poe assured her with a laughed. “Are you hungry?” 

 

    “Not really.” Rey let out a yawn, still tired despite the time she slept already. 

 

    “Are you sure? I’ve got those cream puffs that you used to devour all the time at the base.” Poe tempted her, a teasing smile on his face, and the smile only growing bigger when he saw Rey’s eyes light up almost instantly at the mere mention of sweets. 

 

    “Well...maybe just a few.” Rey stated, trying to hide a smile herself now though she was failing miserably at it. 

 

    “Alright, just a few then.” Poe laughed, getting back up on his feet. “Can you sit up alright?” 

 

    “Yeah.” Rey lied, trying to do so now and only being met with a jolt of pain that made her hiss. “Kriff!” 

 

    “Whoa, slow down there.” Poe sat beside her and slowly helped her lie back down on the pillows that had been underneath her head. “How about we just keep you lying flat for now then?” 

 

    “I’m fine, I can sit up.” Rey protested, knowing that she couldn’t, but not wanting to seem like she couldn’t do whatever she wanted. 

 

    “No, just lie down Rey.” Poe said, keeping her from moving around too much by grabbing a hold of one of her hands and letting his other hand run through her hair that was splayed out on the pillow. “Being still isn’t going to kill you for five minutes.” He added with a slight laugh. 

 

    “Fine.” Rey huffed, giving up and trying to move and letting her eyes drift shut, slightly hypnotized by Poe’s hand running through her hair and rubbing small circles into the palm of her hand with his thumb. 

 

    “Are you going to stay still while I go get those cream puffs for you?” Poe asked. 

 

    “Yes.” Rey nodded. 

 

    With that, Poe got up and walked away, Rey’s eyes opening right back up again at the lack of his presence. She was starting to fidget around just as a familiar beeping of a certain little droid interrupted her and rolled into the room. 

 

_ [Friend-Rey! I’m so happy to see you again! I’ve missed our adventures so much.] _ BB-8 beeped out excitedly, and Rey couldn’t help but realize just how much she missed the little round droid. 

 

    “I’ve missed you so much too, Beebee-Ate.” Rey rolled onto her side and grinned at the little droid, reached out to rest her hand on it’s head, only grinning even more upon hearing happy beeps. 

 

_ [Are you going to stay for a while? Friend-Poe misses you too, he has been very sad for a while now, but he is happy with his friends around.] _ BB-8 explained. 

 

    “A few days at least.” Rey said, pulling her hand away, but upon hearing the sad beep from BB-8, she knew she should stay longer. “But I could stay a bit longer. I haven’t seen Poe in a long time, I want to catch up with him and spend time with you both.” 

 

_ [That would make Friend-Poe so happy!] _ BB-8 exclaimed. 

 

    “It’d make me happy too, I’ve missed the both of you a lot, it’d be nice to stay for a while.” Rey said, it had been a while since she stayed by anyone for a period of time. 

 

_ [There are so many things we can explore together too! Friend-Poe can show you the temple and other ruins here on Yavin 4, and the forests are so fun to see.] _ BB-8 said. 

 

    “Hey buddy, slow down, Rey still has to get better before all of that.” Poe said as he walked back into the room, setting down a large plate filled with cream puffs onto the table. 

 

    “He’s just excited it all.” Rey smirked. “I told him I’d stay a bit longer than a few days, that is if you don’t mind? I know you offered but, I wanted to ask.” Rey said, hoping that she wouldn’t be intruding on anything if she did stay. 

 

    “No, that’s fine, stay as long as you want, it’s just me and Beebee-Ate here, I wouldn’t mind the company.” Poe said with a shrug of his shoulders, Rey couldn’t sense anything being wrong with him which made her feel better about staying for a bit. 

 

    “Well then, I can’t wait to get better, Beebee-Ate has a whole adventure planned out already.” Rey smiled, trying to reach over to the cream puffs on the table. 

 

    “He’s always got something planned out whenever anyone comes around.” Poe reached over to the plate. “Need some help?” He asked. 

 

    “Yeah.” Rey admitted. 

 

    Poe grabbed a cream puff off of the table and handed it over to her. To his surprise, Rey devoured the cream puff in a few seconds and instead of reaching over again and again, Poe grabbed the plate and set it in his lap, making it far easier for him to hand them to her, and easier for Rey to reach back and try to grab one herself. A few minutes into Poe telling her about the places Beebee-Ate had mentioned, Poe had to stop and laugh out of nowhere and Rey couldn’t figure out why. 

 

    “What?” Rey asked. 

 

    “You’ve got some powdered sugar on your face.” Poe laughed. 

 

    “Where?” Rey asked, trying to wipe it off blindly with her arm. 

 

    “I got it.” Poe smirked, using his thumb to wipe away the specks of powdered sugar off of her cheek. “There, all gone.” 

 

    “Thanks.” Rey said, trying to hide blushing a bit. 

 

    “No problem.” Poe said, his eyes lingering on her for a few minutes longer than what should have been deemed as friendly, and it made Rey think a bit of their brushes of flirting in the past, or rather, their brushes with acting on their impulses. 

 

    They’d kissed before, back when they were still fighting in the war, one they were sure they were going to lose at time which was often the cause of them actually kissing. Rey never really had intimate contact with anyone before Poe, nor had she ever thought about it with anyone other than him, but they were in the middle of a war at the time, it wasn’t the time to run off and start this whirlwind romance, they had enough problems going on at the time. But when the war ended, there were no more moments filled with adrenaline, nothing to cause them to kiss, and because of that Rey assumed it had all been a heat of the moment thing, every time they kissed was because they thought they were going to die. But here he was now, just trying to be a friend to her, and for the first time in a long time, something other than guilt crossed her mind, she wanted to kiss Poe again, to try just kissing him without danger in the air, she resisted in that moment however, knowing it wasn’t exactly the time or place for that, especially not after they had just been reunited again after all those years apart. 

 

    “Uh, so,” Poe started as he pulled his hand away from her cheek and looked away to elsewhere in the room. “Do you want to sleep upstairs tonight or do you wanna stay still down here?” He questioned. 

 

    “I think I can make it upstairs with some help later.” Rey said. 

 

    “Okay.” Poe nodded. 

 

    The rest of the night was spent with plenty of awkward silences, though in a strange way it made Rey feel better instead of worse - the awkwardness meant that Poe felt that same spark of something in their little moment too. It was funny, Rey thought, to even think of romance with Poe Dameron. She was just so young at the time when they met, not only in age against Poe, but mentally as well; she didn’t know much about anything outside of life on Jakku, if it wasn’t there, she didn’t know about it, and when she was thrust into all of this, it had been so overwhelming. Poe was a mentor of sorts at first when they met, but then he became her friend, and then he was something she couldn’t lose, she figured that was when feelings changed. But it had been war, they both knew that, and despite the kisses here and there, she thought that maybe it was best that they didn’t have a relationship back then, she never wanted to risk losing a friend. But there was always that part of her that questioned why they never acted on their bond whenever he was around, and even after all these years, seeing him again still made her heart beat just a bit faster and made her wonder what it’d be like to kiss his lips again. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    By the time morning came, Rey felt like her old self again; her head no longer hurt, she knew the bruises were gone, and the swelling around her eye had disappeared. Under normal circumstances, she would be up and ready to go on another venture into the galaxy, but she was with Poe now, and for the first time in years, staying in one place a bit longer didn’t sound too bad. Rey got up and out of bed, the sudden jolt of cool air reminding her that Poe let her sleep in one of his t-shirts last night and that was currently all she was wearing. She walked over to dig through the dresser, hoping Poe would have at least pants in here since he’d taken her clothes last night and offered to wash them since there was dried blood on them. Rey was lucky enough to find a pair of sweatpants and figured those would do for now until she went out to the Falcon to grab her other clothes. Finally fully dressed and a little more awake, Rey began to leave the room and head downstairs. 

 

    She wasn’t surprised to find Poe already awake downstairs, he always had a habit for waking up early. He was trying to make breakfast, and by trying, Rey could smell what he was trying to make burning and heard Poe mumbling curses. 

 

    “Need some help?” Rey asked curiously, peeking into the kitchen. 

 

    “Hmm?” Poe asked, turning around and realizing she was there. “Oh, no, I’ve got it, you don’t need to help, I wanted to make breakfast for you.” 

 

    “I can help, I’m all better I swear.” Rey smirked. “Plus, I think maybe I should be making you breakfast after you save my skin and took care of me.” 

 

    “I’ve got it under control.” Poe tried to assure her. 

 

    “Just at least let me help a little bit.” Rey sighed, she hated feeling like a burden, she’d taken care of herself long before she had friends and family. “Please?” 

 

    “...Alright.” Poe finally relented, and before Poe could give her some direction, Rey just jumped right in and started to help where she could. 

 

    With Rey helping, it didn’t take long for breakfast to get done, the two finally sitting down and eating in peace. 

 

    “It’s a nice house you’ve got here.” Rey said, breaking the peaceful silence of their breakfast that had settled between them as soon as they sat down. 

 

    “Thanks.” Poe replied. “It’s weird though to have all of this room. I’m used to just the base and that one little room.” 

 

    “WHy do you think I stay on the Falcon so much?” Rey asked. “I lived inside and AT-AT for most of my life on Jakku, and then the base, I’ve always stayed in small places.” 

 

    “It’s not bad once you get used to it, the space is nice, and I get to live close to my dad.” Poe said. 

 

    “I wish I could have met him a bit differently.” Rey gave a slight laugh. 

 

    “Don’t worry, you’d be surprised with how many people he’s met for the first time like that.” Poe laughed. “So where were you out there when you got into that fight?” 

 

    “I was on Tatooine, I just ticked the wrong people off is all.” Rey gave a slight shrug. “Won’t be going back there anytime soon.” 

 

    “Where was Chewie when this happened? I imagine he would have helped.” Poe said. 

 

    “He would have, but I liked to him about where I was going, he thought I’d be okay going to a cantina alone, but I didn’t go to the cantina.” Rey admitted. 

 

    “Where’d you go?” Poe asked. 

 

    “Somewhere I shouldn’t have is all.” Rey sighed. “It’s already done, no point in worrying.” 

 

    Rey studied Poe to see how he’d react next. Back when they were in the midst of the war, he controlled his emotions pretty well; yes, there were times when he’d be a bit irrational, but for the most part he kept them contained. But Rey had seen him once when the war was finally over, and all it took was for one person to look at her the wrong way and Poe overreacted, it took her and Finn to stop him and help him calm down. Of course two years had passed since then, Rey knew he’d talked to doctors about what had him so on edge, whether they actually helped or not Rey had yet to see, but she didn’t want him to get wound up over this. 

 

    “Okay.” Poe let out a sigh, calming himself down. 

 

    “I’m fine now, that’s what matters, right?” Rey asked. 

 

    “Yeah, yeah it is.” Poe nodded his head. 

 

    “So...got anymore of those cream puffs?” Rey asked with a grin. 

 

    “Surprisingly, I do, but something tells me in a few minutes I won’t have them anymore.” Poe laughed. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    In the end, it had been an enjoyable day and a rather quiet evening. Poe had broken out some Corellian liquor after dinner and that had them both relaxing and laughing, telling each other stories. Eventually they stumbled upstairs to bed, Poe going to his room though he drunkenly flirted with Rey and offered up that she could sleep in his bed with him if she wanted, to which Rey was grateful that she could still think clearly enough to decline and go to the guest bed. She changed into one of Poe’s old t-shirts again, finding them far more comfortable than what she used to sleep in, and she was able to fall asleep almost instantly. However somewhere in the middle of her blissful and peaceful sleep, she was jolted awake by this feeling of fear piercing her thoughts and having her sit upright, trying to catch her breath. It was something through the Force, something from someone nearby that she was sure could only be from Poe, he was afraid, why was he so afraid? 

 

    Tossing her blankets aside and not bothering to get fully dressed, Rey rushed out of the room and down the hall to Poe’s bedroom, quietly opening the door and seeing him lying in bed, his own blankets kicked off while he was covered in sweat, mumbling under his breath. Rey didn’t hesitate in reacting, she simply crossed the room and sat down on the edge of his bed, taking a hold of one of his hands and squeezing it while closing her eyes, trying to use whatever she could of the Force to help calm Poe down from whatever nightmares were haunting him. It took a few minutes, and it drained plenty out of Rey, but he finally calmed down and opened up his eyes as Rey took one of her hands to run through his hair and push it back from where it was clinging to his face. 

 

    “Sorry.” Poe managed to mumble out, still half asleep from the looks of it. 

 

    “Don’t be.” Rey whispered back. “Are you okay?” 

 

    “Better now.” He mumbled to her. “You should stay.” 

 

    “I can make it back to my room.” Rey lied, she was almost certain that she couldn’t. 

 

    “I don’t want the nightmare to come back.” Poe mumbled, more of a plea this time than before. “Stay.” 

  
    Rey finally relented with a sigh, nodding her head as Poe shuffled over in bed to make room for her. When she finally hit his pillow, she was glad she didn’t put up much of a fight, she was even more tired than before she helped Poe. She wasn’t used to having people so close to her while she slept, but she had to admit that for the moment it felt nice, especially with his arm around her and holding her there in bed, and she appreciated the space he tried to keep between them despite him wanting to pull her closer. It didn’t take long for Poe to fall back asleep, Rey could hear his breathing even out and feel the muscles in his arm relax when he did, and once he was sound asleep, Rey was able to fall sound asleep herself, hoping that she chased Poe’s nightmare away for the night. 


	3. Something I Couldn't Forget

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Finally! It took me a bit longer than expected to finally get this done, but here we are and I hope you lovelies out there like it, comments are always appreciated! <3

    By morning, Rey woke up realizing she was still in Poe’s bed, and that despite the warmth, Poe was already up and about for the day. Rey shuffled out of bed and back to the guest room she was staying in, finally putting on her own clothes before heading downstairs. Poe was in the living room drinking some coffee when she found him, and from the looks of it he was drawing something in a sketchbook of his. Something about seeing that pained Rey a bit, she thought she knew most everything about Poe, and that only proved she didn’t, it made her feel a bit further apart from him than the closeness she felt in their bond last night. 

 

    “What are you drawing?” Rey asked as she finished her descent down the stairs. 

 

    “Oh, uh, nothing really.” Poe replied, keeping his gaze on what he was drawing despite the uncertainty in his voice. 

 

    “Seems like you’re drawing something.” Rey pried, hoping to get an answer without having to resort to snooping. 

 

    “Yeah.” Poe laughed. “I’m just drawing something from memory.” 

 

    Rey peaked over his shoulder, realizing that he wouldn’t tell her, and quickly realized why he didn’t wish to tell her. It was a monster, cloaked in black and darkness, something that haunted her nightmares when she dwelled on it for too long - Kylo Ren. An entity she had mentally separated from the man that was supposed to be her brother, someone who was once a Jedi himself, when he was just Ben Solo. 

 

    “Huh.” Was all Rey could think of for a reply. 

 

    Poe turned around to see her standing there behind him, startled by how close her voice was, and quickly turned back to close his sketchbook before tossing it beside him, almost looking as if he had done something wrong and his demeanor shifting to something meek and very unlike the Poe Dameron that she knew and had committed to her memory over the past three years. 

 

    “Sorry.” He mumbled. 

 

    “No, don’t be, it’s okay.” Rey sighed, shaking her head and making her way around the sofa to sit beside him. “Was that what you had nightmares about last night?” She didn’t want to say  _ it’s _ name, it was bad enough to think it, but she wasn’t the only one left with scars from Kylo Ren, Poe was left with just as deep if not more so nightmares of the cloaked monster. 

 

    “Yeah.” Poe admitted, nodding his head and still keeping his gaze down and away from her. “I didn’t want to tell you, it was just a nightmare about him and I know you have probably enough of them yourself.” 

 

    “I get it.” Rey stated, reaching out and taking his hand to give it a quick squeeze, relieved when he finally looked back up at her. “It’s okay, I know what he put you through, you have every right to nightmares and you have every right to share them.” 

 

    “Yeah, but-” 

 

    “Don’t worry about me.” Rey cut him off. “I can handle it.” She lied through her teeth though she didn’t want to alienate Poe because of these nightmares, he was the only person she could truly connect to. Finn had served his time and his battles against Kylo Ren, yes, but he didn’t understand fully what he had put Poe and herself through, the torture, the manipulation, the using of their own bond against themselves; Poe was the only one who understood her loss of self because he suffered the same. “If something is bothering you,  _ anything _ , just tell me, I can listen if you need that.” 

 

    Poe hesitated for a moment, searching her eyes for something, and she wasn’t sure if he failed to find it or succeeded to find what he was looking for, but he finally nodded and squeezed her hand back. “Thank you.” 

 

    “No problem.” Rey assured him, trying her best to crack a smile and lighten the mood a bit, more importantly to shift the topic of conversation to something far more enjoyable than painful war memories. “So...any adventures planned for today?” 

 

_ [Friend-Poe, we should take Friend-Rey into town today, the bakery is open all day today.] _ BB-8 stated, Rey jumped a bit startled by the little droids presence, she hadn’t seen him in the corner of the room when she entered, she supposed that was because all she was focused on was Poe instead of constantly on her guard and alert of everything around her. 

 

    “That’s right, I almost forgot about that.” Poe said, his eyes lighting up with that familiar happiness Rey knew all too well, that same look and smile that had comforted her so many times when she felt so afraid. “Well, if you’re feeling better, we can go get some more of those cream puffs you love so much today.” He said to her. 

 

    “Like I’d ever pass up the chance to get sweets.” Rey laughed. 

 

    “Is your head okay?” Poe asked, immediately reaching over and trying to feel where the injury had been. 

 

    Rey grabbed his arm without thinking, it was a reflex still ingrained in her, despite getting used to things such as hugs and normal close interaction. However, when it came to real closeness, she still had those reflexes from Jakku and from the war. Slowly she let go of his arm and gave a slight nod, letting him continue to try and check her. He pulled away a few seconds later, finding no bumps or any residual injuries from the attack that she had sustained. 

 

    “It’s fine.” Rey finally spoke, breaking the silence and brief connection they shared. 

 

    “Okay...good.” Poe slowly said, his eyes lingering on her a bit longer before he turned away and let out a sigh. 

 

    “You ready to go?” She asked, jumping up off the sofa and trying not to think of their connecting moments, they were familiar to her and usually led to those swift and passionate kisses she remembered, but they weren’t fighting a war anymore, they were safe, and she had to control her emotions a bit better rather than acting on impulse as her brother had which led him down a path of his own creation.  

 

    “I just gotta grab my jacket.” Poe said, getting up himself now. “I’ll go grab it upstairs and then we can go.” 

 

    Rey nodded as Poe left her side, his boots thumping against the stairs and leaving her to her own devices. She didn’t let her mind linger long, instead she noticed some of the loose pages sticking out of Poe’s sketchbook that he had so haphazardly cast aside. Rey plucked some of the pictures out and shuffled through them; one was a stoic rendition of the famous statue on the small planet of Naboo of Padmé Amidala, her grandmother whom she only just now was hearing stories of, she had almost forgotten that Poe had been there for a few months after the war when everyone first separated - he was restoring order to the galaxy and she was trying to escape it all. The second was of a woman she had never seen before, but there was something about her eyes that seemed familiar, and after piecing it together Rey figured it must have been a drawing of the famous Shara Bey - his mother that he lost when he was so young. The last was of something she’d almost forgotten; it was when she had returned to the base with Luke Skywalker as her new teacher, and she had just learned how to start lifting things with the Force, she tried it on BB-8 who appreciated it far more than C-3PO, and she had a smile on her face that she knew she had experienced in a long time, but Poe captured it so beautifully and she couldn’t help but grin herself at the memory. It seemed like such an intimate moment for him to remember, it was just her, BB-8, and him out by the lake close to the new Resistance base, it seemed like ages ago, and she was a different person back then, still none the wiser to her parentage. Had he drawn this at the time and she hadn’t noticed? Had he drawn this so accurately from memory as he drew the subject of his nightmare? If he had, then it had been an important moment to him, it seemed that all these pictures he drew were of important moments and people in his life - good or bad - and somehow she had ended up among them. 

 

    “Ready?” Poe asked as he walked down the stairs, Rey quickly trying to put the pictures back where she found them before he saw. 

 

    “Yeah, let’s go.” Rey quickly replied. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    They returned from town laughing, having a good time and probably on a bit of a sugar high from all the sweets they devoured. When they returned to Poe’s house, they found not only his father standing outside the home, but Chewbacca, and there beside him was an unexpected guest, Rey’s mother - Leia Organa herself. 

 

    “Le-...Mom?” Rey corrected herself, she’d mentioned to Poe that it was still hard to try and call Leia her mother, she’d been without her for so long that even upon finding her family, she still couldn’t process that she now had family - as small as it now was. 

 

  “Rey, I had to check on you myself.” Leia let out a sigh of relief, walking over and hugging Rey tightly. 

 

    Rey went rigid, not knowing how to exactly react before eventually hugging her back quickly and letting go. Leia eventually pulled away as well and before the awkwardness could set in, Poe decided to interrupt the silence. 

 

    “Anybody want to stay for dinner? I picked up some stuff in town.” Poe offered. 

 

    “Sure, as long as you don’t mind us just dropping in like this.” Leia said, Chewbacca making what sounded like a noise of approval beside her. 

 

    “It’s not a problem.” Poe assured them. 

 

    “I’ll take them inside.” Rey said, just above a mumble before heading towards the door and letting Leia and Chewbacca into the home, disappearing in after them. 

 

    “Everything okay?” Kes walked up and asked Poe once everyone else was gone. 

 

    “Yeah, I just don’t think Rey’s gotten used to having Leia around, or everything else that happened. With all that happened, I can’t say I blame here.” Poe sighed. 

 

    “I meant you.” Kes smirked. “Leia was talking about how things were with Rey while we were waiting for you two to get back. You’re looking pretty rough.” 

 

    “Oh, uh, nightmare last night, it’s fine.” Poe tried to brush it off. 

 

    “Which one?” Kes asked, he knew all of the ones Poe experienced, unfortunately. 

 

    “...The almost dying one.” Poe said before heading to the door, wanting to be around Rey instead of talking about all of the things that still haunted him. 

 

     Inside Poe could hear Leia talking mostly, Chewie chiming in occasionally, but Rey was silent. In the living room, Poe found her already eating some of her treats from the bakery, trying to keep her mouth full to avoid talking. Poe remembered from sometime after she discovered her parentage, she completely shut down, she didn’t want to talk, and most importantly she was full of anger; he had to stop her more than a few times in those early days. After she managed to keep her emotions somewhat controlled, she refused to talk about anything related to the Skywalker family, it was almost as if she was trying to convince herself that she was still just the girl from Jakku who had no one though that couldn’t be further from the truth. 

 

    “Rey, wanna help me make some dinner for everybody?” Poe asked, offering her an escape route. 

 

    “Yeah!” Rey jumped at the offer trying to swallow her food too. “I mean, yeah, sure.” Rey tried to calm herself down a bit. 

 

    “Come on.” Poe smirked and stifled a laugh while she shot him a glare, he missed that glare all too much. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    It was close to midnight or around that by the time everyone was leaving. Poe said his goodbyes to his father while Rey was in the process of saying goodbye to Leia and Chewie. He knew he shouldn’t have listened in on her saying goodbye downstairs, but he did anyway. 

 

    “You know you can talk to me about anything. Your father...your brother.” Leia sighed. 

 

    “I-It’s okay.” Rey interjected. 

 

    “Are you alright staying here?” Leia asked curiously. 

 

    “Yeah, Poe offered, I figured I’d try staying still for a week or so.” Rey replied. 

 

    “Sounds familiar.” Leia said endearingly. 

 

    “I’ll be okay.” Rey tried to assure her, though something in her voice told Poe she wasn’t sure about that. 

 

    “Okay.” Leia said. “Well, in that case, I have to leave this with you, he wanted you to have it.” 

 

    There was silence, Poe wasn’t sure what Leia was giving Rey, but it must have meant something to her to make her go silent. 

 

    “Why?” Rey finally asked. 

 

    “To get rid of it, I guess he trusted you to make sure it’s never found.” Leia explained. 

 

    “Right, okay.” Rey mumbled. 

 

    They exchanged their goodbyes after that, Chewie returned Kes’ ship while he and Leia flew back to Coruscant on their ship; Kes stayed a while longer, talking and laughing while telling stories to Rey about Poe when he was younger. When Kes did leave, Rey went in the shower, promising to come back, but she never did. Poe went upstairs looking for her, finding her sleeping on her bed with another one of his t-shirts on, curled up in a ball and more than likely freezing since her hair was still wet and she didn’t have any of the blankets pulled up around her. Carefully, Poe grabbed the blanket at the end of the bed and wrapped it around her, trying to avoid the temptation of just letting his fingers brush against her bare skin. While putting the blanket around her, Poe noticed that she was clasping onto something wrapped up in her hands, he carefully slid it out of her grip and unwrapped it, pausing when he realized what it was - a Kyber crystal - red and cracked, belonging to the only person he could think of upon seeing it, Kylo Ren. 

 

    “It’s not all that intimidating like that, is it?” Rey asked, startling Poe as he looked down to find her on her side and looking up at him. 

 

    “Sorry.” Poe said, wrapping the crystal back up and handing it to her. 

 

    “It’s fine, I was trying to think about where to get rid of it, where it can’t hurt anyone ever again.” Rey sighed, taking the crystal and putting it on the nightstand. “It killed a lot of people, innocents, friends, my father, ...my brother. It deserves to be smashed into dust and lost to the wind.” 

 

    “We’ll get rid of it.” Poe assured her, trying to calm her down. 

 

    “Okay.” Rey nodded her head. “Okay.” 

 

    “Go back to sleep, we’ll handle it in the morning.” Poe said. 

 

    “You okay sleeping alone tonight?” Rey asked. “Because I don’t think I am.” Rey admitted. 

 

    “I’ll sleep with you if you want.” Poe said, realizing now what he said. “Uh, I mean, beside you not really with you, not like that I mean - “ 

 

    “I get it.” Rey cracked a smile and laughed a bit. “We can go in your though, I know a certain little droid who needs to charge and won’t leave your side.” Rey nodded towards the open doorway where BB-8 was tentatively rolling back and forth. 

 

    “Right.” Poe laughed.

 

    Rey followed Poe, making herself comfortable under the sheets and blankets in his bed while Poe went to the bathroom to go get changed. In that short time, she fell asleep again and he tried not to disturb her, only for her eyes to flutter open and for her arms to wrap around him. 

 

    “Night.” Rey mumbled.  

 

    “Night.” Poe replied. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


_ The red saber was hissing and crackling, inches away from Poe’s skin, him on his knees as Kylo Ren held the lightsaber up to his neck. Rey was frozen in place, watching and waiting as the desperate monster made it’s final stand before breaking.  _

 

_     “I’ll kill him.” The voice of the monster crackled under the mask. “He only holds you back as Han Solo did for me.”  _

 

_     Rey didn’t reply, instead she lunged forward her lightsaber sinking into the monster as he fell to the floor, a scared Poe Dameron left with only a burn on his neck as a souvenir. She knelt down to him, kissing his lips only for a moment before the monster rose and struck her in his last desperate moments.  _

  
  


* * *

  
  


    Rey woke up gasping and sobbing, sitting upright in bed, trying to process where she was. 

 

    “Rey?” Poe mumbled half asleep. “Rey!” He exclaimed as he noticed her state. “Rey, it’s okay, it’s just a bad dream.” 

  
    He held her while she cried, and he held her when they fell back asleep, Rey’s hand resting on the scar that almost tore him from her. 


	4. Sensitivity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Short chapter compared to the others, but I consider this more of a transition chapter I suppose (if that makes sense)? Moving on to the next part of the story and into bigger and deeper things, piecing together what happened after all was said and done. As always, comments are greatly appreciated and I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

    Poe knew something was wrong with Rey, he could just sense it, she had been that way ever since Leia had given her Kylo Ren’s Kyber crystal. She would still smile and laugh, but he could tell that she was faking all of it, her heart just didn’t seem to be in any of it. He spent the last two days trying to figure out what he might do to cheer her up, but he’d already attempted everything he knew worked; she loved sweets and now he was sure she was practically sick of sweets from all the ones she’d eaten since she’d been here, she enjoyed meditating, and Poe had left her alone enough times for her to do so, but she always seemed the same. He offered to talk to her about anything, but Rey always insisted there was nothing to talk about, she was putting herself behind a wall and Poe didn’t know how to reach out to her and figure out what was bothering her. 

 

    “Wanna go for a hike or something?” Poe asked, they were just lounging inside on the sofa, Rey trying not to fall asleep sitting up while Poe was braiding her hair; a hidden and comforting talent she’d enjoyed in their days at the base and was relishing at this very moment. 

 

    “Sure.” Rey said with a yawn, trying to keep herself from leaning back, fighting to keep her eyes open. 

 

    “You sound more like you’re ready for bed then for a hike.” Poe laughed. 

 

    Rey didn’t react to that at all, she just stayed sullen and silent until Poe finished the braids and pinned them into a style she used to wear often once she changed from the three buns. As soon as his hand just brushed the back of her neck, Rey jumped to life out of her haxe and cracked a smile to try and convince Poe that she was okay - though he knew different. 

 

    “Fresh air might do us some good.” Poe tried to convince her. 

 

    “Yeah, okay.” Rey nodded. “Let me go get my boots.” 

 

    She walked off without another word, and Poe couldn’t help but turn to BB-8 once she was out of earshot. 

 

    “Do you think she’s okay, buddy?” Poe asked, for a droid of BB-8’s make, he certainly learned how to catch on to human emotions and when they changed. 

 

_ [I do not, Friend-Poe. Friend-Rey seems very sad and very disconnected.] _ BB-8 tried to explain as best as he could. 

 

    “Disconnected?” Poe questioned. Depressed, he could believe, but disconnected was such an oddly specific word for BB-8 to choose. 

 

    Before BB-8 could reply, Rey came back downstairs ready to go on their adventure for the day. Something about how she looked standing there caught him off guard; he found it hard to believe that there was once a time where he got to see her like this everyday, he even recalled a few times where he thought he just might see her face everyday for the rest of his life, thought they were only thoughts he kept to himself. 

 

    “Where are we going?” Rey asked curiously. 

 

    “A few places you might like hopefully.” Poe said as he rose up off the couch. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    Poe had taken her almost everywhere he could think of, she’d smile as say that she enjoyed it - but Poe knew different. He could just sense the unease resting in her, something that Poe could only identify as what BB-8 had said earlier - disconnected. There was only one place left he wanted to take her and it was surprisingly close to home than the other sights. 

 

    “What’s this?” Rey asked, resting her hand against the tree bark. Why did she ask? Wouldn’t she be able to feel it? 

 

    “It’s the Force tree Luke gave my mom. I thought you’d like it here...or at least the peacefulness of it.” Poe shrugged, suddenly unsure of bringing her here, her mood didn’t seem to shift. 

 

    “Oh, no, it’s...it’s great.” Rey put on that fake smile, though she looked like she was about to cry. 

 

    “Are you okay?” Poe asked, walking up to her and surprised at how close she was allowing him to get. “You just seem...off.” 

 

    “I’m okay.” Rey quickly replied. “It’s just, uhm, overwhelming.” 

 

    “Do you want to be left alone?” Poe asked, she had been at his side these past few days, perhaps she just needed a break. After all, she was used to being on her own, with really only a Wookie at her side. 

 

    “Yeah.” Rey nodded. “For a little bit.” 

 

    “Okay.” Poe assured her. “You know where to find me.” 

 

    He didn’t know why he felt the need to do so, they hadn’t had any real contact that could be interpreted as romantic for a while; but he leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her cheek, lingering for a minute longer than he should have before walking off, nervous and sensing Rey’s conflicting emotions running around now as well. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    Rey came back hours later, shortly after the sun set with her nose red and eyes watery. Poe tried to talk to her, but she quickly shut him down by saying she wanted to lay down for a bit and be by herself. He didn’t know if he had made her upset, he didn’t know what had made her upset, but he left her alone despite feeling the need to chase after her. She did come down and eat a few bites of dinner, he wasn’t sure if it was because she wasn’t very hungry or it wasn’t very good - he desperately needed to get better at cooking - but she returned back upstairs without another word afterwards and Poe didn’t see her until he was going to sleep himself. 

 

    He just got under the covers when Rey gently knocked on his door, in her usual nightwear for while she was staying here, and carefully padding over to his bed before getting under the covers herself. She wrapped herself around him instantly, hugging him closer to her as if she didn’t want to ever let go, searching for something and seeming dissatisfied when Poe hugged her back. Afterwards she stayed close to him, her hand tracing scars on his arms until she fell asleep. Poe didn’t want to sleep, there was something wrong with Rey and she wasn’t telling him, he wanted to find out, but he also didn’t want to scare her off, he came to regret not asking her by the time morning came. 

  
    Because when he woke up, Rey and all of her things were long gone, the Falcon nowhere in sight. 


	5. Back to Basics

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Well, as short as this chapter is, it was literally giving me anxiety to write it because I couldn't shake this feeling that this was a terrible chapter. I almost didn't want to post it, but at the same time I couldn't think of how else to progress the story. I'm posting it late because if I waited until tomorrow, I probably wouldn't post it at all! I hope you guys like this chapter regardless of my brain making me think stupid thoughts, and leave a comment if you like it. <3

    For most of her life, Rey never ran, it was part of her nature to stand still and wait; however it was in her blood to run. Her mother had a history of standing her ground, but the father she never got to truly know loved to run, and whenever things got a little too tough, he ran; he ran when Rey was first born, he ran when Ben was born, it was just his nature and it had become hers too. She never thought less of her father because of that, he was a smuggler, smugglers ran to save their skin, it’s how he survived for a long time, and Jakku was how Rey survived for a long time - it made sense to run back to the planet she spent so many years waiting and surviving. 

 

    She didn't expect Poe to know, no one did - but she wasn't the girl the galaxy thought she was anymore, certainly not the strong version of herself she knew Poe had fallen in love with, back when she could feel it. Rey didn't need the Force to tell her there was some part of him that still felt something for her, despite all the times she ran from him after the war when he tried to reach out - he always had the most expressive eyes she had ever seen. She doubt there was anything left after running again, but he had told her once that he was a hopeless romantic, probably because of the stories he had told her about his parents, and after meeting Kes, Rey could understand why Poe was so idealistic about everyone and everything. Rey figured she could have told him, but she couldn't bear the thought of looking at those eyes full of pity for her - she was supposed to be a Jedi and a Hero, not so weak as she was now. No, Rey chose to run, it was her choice in the end after all, she was never very good at sitting still after she left Jakku, she wouldn't fair well with a person who wanted to settle. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    Poe didn't know how to explain it, he just  _ knew _ where Rey went, he never doubted for a second in this knowing; it was like a gut feeling he got in the middle of a dog fight and didn't have time to question it before he could react. As soon as his feet hit the floor, it was like he was back at the base, running around to get ready for a quick take-off in his faithful X-Wing that truly needed to be flown more often. He was just about to take off when the sight of his father just in front of the X-Wing made him stop. 

 

    “You going after her?” Kes shouted up, Poe taking off his helmet to hear him better. 

 

    “Yeah, you saw her leave?” Poe asked. 

 

    “About two hours ago.” Kes said. “You know...if you pissed her off, she reminds me a lot of your mother, you didn’t want to go find your mother right away when she was angry.”

 

    “She’s not angry, something has her upset.” Poe sighed. “I’ll be back.” 

 

    “You know where she went?” Kes asked, a bit surprised. 

 

    “I’ve got an idea.” Poe replied before putting his helmet back on and starting the X-Wing up, getting ready to take off with BB-8 now ready to go as well. 

 

    Poe hesitated for a moment, he hadn't been up in the air for a while, he tried to avoid it really, but he wasn't going to let a bit of fear stop him.  Kes stepped back, staying up close by Poe’s house as he got the X-Wing off the ground and set course for the only place he knew Rey would go - Jakku. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    It was midafternoon and Rey had almost forgotten what the intense heat of Jakku was like after all these years. The way it heat up the metal of her AT-AT home, the way it brought the sand to a point where it could burn her skin, and there was some strange part of her that had missed it, it even made her smile. All of the valuable things had been scavenged from in the home, someone had found it, more than likely Teedo, but that didn’t matter anymore. Everything that she considered truly valuable now was still there - the blankets that kept her warm on the cold nights, the doll she crafted when she was so young just to keep her company, and the helmet she held onto that inspired her to learn how to fly just like the Rebellion pilots. So much had changed, she wasn’t the little girl that she used to be so long ago on this desert planet, but so much of her wished that she could be, just for a moment. 

 

    She wasn’t surprised by the hum of a ship landing close to her home, she was expecting it to show up at any moment. Rey knew Poe would find her here, and she supposed that if she really wanted to run she could have gone anywhere else in the galaxy, but she came here, and he came after her, and she that counted for something - for what she didn’t know - but it made her heart beat just a bit faster upon hearing that hum. Rey was grabbing her bag full of things, getting ready to face the music of her running off and just say what she’d been avoiding after some time alone, but before she could even get out the door, Poe was running up to the AT-AT, crawling into her makeshift home, and wrapping his arms around her, holding her close. Before everything, she would have been able to feel the emotion behind a hug like this from a mile away, and despite it all, she still felt a twinge of something with his arms wrapped around her - something that made her feel safe. 

 

    “Are you alright? Are you hurt? Did anything happen to you?” Poe asked right away, pelting her with questions as soon as he thought of them. 

 

    “Poe, I was here for a few hours, I’m fine.” Rey tried to assure him. “How did you know where I was?” 

 

    Poe hesitated for a moment, just letting his eyes scan her, letting himself know that she was there and right in front of him in one piece again. He was afraid, Rey didn’t need the Force to tell that, he was always expressive in what he felt, and right now he was terrified, trying to keep his hands from shaking. He flew across the galaxy to get her, probably one of the few times he’d flown since the accident that almost killed him while he was trying to protect her. 

 

    “I just...I just knew.” Poe shrugged, trying to snap out of whatever thoughts were starting to plague his mind. “Come on, we should get back.” Poe started to make his way out of the AT-AT, but Rey grabbed his hand and made him stay. 

 

    “When was the last time you flew before today?” Rey asked quietly, focusing her efforts on reading Poe’s actions. 

 

    “What? Oh, uh...a few months ago I guess.” Poe shrugged, avoiding her gaze, he was lying, he was just as bad as it as she was. 

 

    “You jumped into an X-Wing after all this time just to come and find me? Maybe you should rest for a bit, your hands are shaking.” She pointed out, taking a hold of one of them and giving them a brief squeeze; she had been so wrapped up in her own problems that she had forgotten Poe had plenty of his own, she had seen Poe truly scared once, sometime after the war when she was visiting Coruscant, she hated seeing him so afraid and being helpless to do anything about it. Right now the last thing he needed was to jump into the X-Wing again by himself and have an anxiety attack, leaving her helpless to help him. “Please, for me?” 

  
    Poe looked up at her, his brown eyes full of fear, and he managed to nod before situating himself beside her in the AT-AT, leaning in closer to her when Rey wrapped his arms around him. He’d been taking care of her the past few days and more than likely ruined some progress he made with flying just to come and get her, the least she could do is make sure he was okay before getting him back home, and if that meant a few days on Jakku again - then so be it. 


	6. For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: SURPRISE! Ha, I actually remembered a fic I set aside! Plus not to mention I already posted a Rebelcaptain chapter tonight and now there's this! I had started this chapter about two weeks ago I wanna say, I've been working on it on and off, and it's not the longest chapter in the world, but I'm back in the groove of my Damerey babes on top of my Rebelcaptain babes! I'm so glad to finally be working on one of my older fic (though it's not the oldest, trust me, you don't wanna know how long one of these Damerey fics have gone without being update). Either way, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, consider it a New Year's surprise! :3

    Rey had managed to get them all back to Yavin 4, it was a bit of a blur since she was still half asleep when they left, but she knew she had BB-8 help her program the Falcon to get home while she flew Poe’s X-Wing back. By the time they got back to Yavin 4, the sun was still inching it’s way up into the sky, and both Poe and Rey looked worse for wear. She considered offering up breakfast since she’d learned to cook in her off time after the war, but she was so tired she would rather collapse than do anything else. Poe disappeared into his room silently, only coming back out to seek out Rey after he changed out of his flight suit, dark circles now evident under his eyes from the lack of sleep he got on Jakku, not only for the lack of a comfortable bed - but because of the stress he put himself through to get to Rey. 

 

    “You should get some rest.” Rey spoke quietly, Poe close enough to her to hear her crystal clear and mumble something before giving her a slight nod. 

 

    “Are you gonna sleep too?” Poe questioned. 

 

    “I was thinking about it, yeah.” Rey said, a yawn escaping and only confirming her need for sleep as well. 

 

    He didn’t say anything else, just nodded before crawling into Rey’s bed, seemingly waiting for her to get in beside him. Rey got changed quickly with her back to Poe before getting in bed beside him, feeling relieved to have his arms wrapped around her; she didn’t know what made her feel that way with Poe, but he always did, even before she truly knew him, he just had that effect on her. Rey rolled over in his arms, he was already drifting off to sleep as his breathing evened out, and she just smiled while she ran her fingers through his dark curls. She’d always thought of Poe as a loyal friend, despite how close they had gotten at times, they were always friends because that was easier to deal with during a war than admitting something more. But now they were free of that, they were free of a lot of things that kept them apart before, so why did she still feel the need to hide these feelings from Poe? 

 

    Rey could think of one that came to mind, she didn’t want to burden Poe with what she had been dealing with all this time. Between her choice to let her brother live, and her loss of the Force in doing so to keep Ben alive, she didn’t want Poe to bear these burdens too. It was safer if they were friends, less trauma for the both of them, but that didn’t stop Rey from pressing a feather light kiss to his nose, only smiling a bit more as he pulled her closer for comfort before closing her eyes herself and hoping to catch a few winks of sleep before BB-8 would wake them in a few hours. 

 

* * *

  
  


    Poe woke up screaming, he hated when he woke up like that, especially now with Rey beside him who he managed to scare awake - her hazel eyes wide and full of fear as she gripped onto him and was trying her best to calm him. 

 

    “Poe, it’s okay, it’s okay.” Rey said, her arms wrapped around him to hold him close to her, despite the cold sweat that had taken over him. 

 

    He’d been so caught up in his stress from the nightmare that he didn’t realize Rey was peppering the side of his face with kisses to calm him until he’d gotten his heartbeat to calm down a bit. As soon as he glanced over at her, she stopped, her hands on each side of his face now, trying to get him to focus on her instead of what had made him afraid. 

 

    “You’re okay.” She tried to reassure him one more time, and this time it got through to him. 

 

    “I’m okay.” He mumbled as he nodded to her in reassurance. 

 

    Rey pressed her forehead against his for a moment, trying to even out her own breathing now, it was bad enough when he got himself worked up, he didn’t want Rey to have to suffer through the same just because of a nightmare - though it often felt real rather than just a dream he can wake up from. Once Rey was calm now as well, she pulled away, though still choosing to keep ahold of his hand while they just sat there in bed, trying to enjoy the silence and each other’s company. 

 

    “Sorry about that.” Poe finally managed to speak up. 

 

    “Poe, don’t apologize for that, if anything I should be apologizing to you for it.” Rey sighed. “I know what he did to you.” 

 

    Poe flinched away at that, he remembered spilling his guts out to Rey after all was said and done, he had more drinks in him than he could count and he was terrified to sleep since the liquor helped dull the thoughts while awake, but while asleep they were always worse. He could still feel how Kylo Ren just tore his mind apart without a care, digging deeper and deeper into his head until he got what he wanted. Poe remembered every second of that pain and how it only hurt the longer he tried to hold everything he knew back; and now almost every night he relieved it, the pain, the weakness he felt when giving Kylo Ren what he wanted, how disgusted he was with himself for a while because of that. Rey had been the only one he told all of that too, and she was the only one who had told him that it was okay to be weak; he should have felt comfortable around her like this, but he hated every second of it. Rey leaned over and pressed a kiss to his cheek before untangling herself from him, getting out of bed and getting a pair of pants back on before picking his up off the ground and handing them to him. 

 

    “Come on, let’s go get some air, okay?” Rey asked, the fear in her eyes replaced with a glimmer of something that Poe couldn’t quite catch. 

 

    “Okay.” Poe replied. 

  
  


* * *

  
  


    The sun had just barely risen when they made their way outside, the air still brisk and cool as opposed to the heat that would later set in the higher the sun rose in the sky. Rey had stolen one of his jackets to wear outside for their little walk, he was half tempted to let her keep it just for the fact of that she looked far better in it, not that it had anything to do with him thinking she looked beautiful in anything, especially if it was something that she’d stolen from him. They went into his backyard, Rey going straight for the Koyo melons that he’d introduced her to what felt like ages ago. She grabbed a couple for the both of them before taking a seat in the still slightly damp grass, Poe sitting beside her and finding it almost relaxing to watch her eagerly dive into the fruit. 

 

    “What?” She asked after a while, mouth half full of food still and juice dripping from her chin. 

 

    “Here.” Poe laughed, reaching out and wiping the juice from her face with the sleeve of his sweater. 

 

    “Thanks.” Rey offered up a smile once she’d swallowed her food, looking a bit more flush in the cheeks than Poe remembered. 

 

    “I should be thanking you.” Poe mumbled as his eyes went back to the sunrise. 

 

    “Why’s that?” Rey asked curiously. 

 

    “For being here, for getting me back home...everything really.” Poe said. 

  
    Rey was silent, for a minute he thought he might have said too much, but just when he thought he’d crossed a line, she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. It was quick and fleeting, just as her kisses from before had been, but it was comforting nonetheless, and that was all Poe could ever really hope for. She rested her head on his shoulder after that, the two of them just sitting there in silence, watching the sun rise on this peaceful morning. 


End file.
